Less than perfect
by Sophies-Welt
Summary: Abby's view on Gibbs


This is a songfic about the song "Fucking perfect" from Pink. The first time I heard it, I just had to think about Gabby! :-) Hopefully you'll like. As for english not being my first language I hope I've understood the song the right way, if not, please let me know.

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Less than perfect

It was the day of the formal ball of NCIS which had been introduced under Director Vance and he obliged everyone to come. No excuses were accepted and that's why Gibbs hated it. He hadn't found a loophole to get out of it yet. Every year in the time of the ball his relationships with his different wives started to crumble. This time it was with Diane…

Abby was pacing nervously down in her lab. She was going to sing at the ball, she didn't know why she had asked the director if she could perform her new song with her band. It was a song about him, Gibbs, her silver-haired-fox and their kinky relationship/friendship or whatever this was….

Later that evening at the ball:

Gibbs had finally arrived with Diane, they were about an hour late. He came just in right time to hear the Director announce that Miss Sciuto and her band were going to entertain them now.

When Gibbs saw Abby stepping on the stage he was speechless. She wore a deep crimson velvet dress, accentuating her female figure. Her hair was pinned up and just some loose curls were dangling into her face. She wore high heels, so high, he'd bet she couldn't walk in, or why would she always make such a scene when she had to wear them to court? But she walked perfectly swaying with her hips.

The light went out and only the spotlights were illuminating the room. They music started to play and Abby started to sing with her husky voice and her red tempting lips started to move:

_Made a wrong turn  
Once or twice_

Oh yes she did! when she started dating all those crazy freaks which always stalked or threatened her, like Michael. But she had to date someone, she was feeling so alone, and she didn't know if Gibbs felt the same or would ever start to feel the same, maybe one day, probably not.

_Dug my way out  
Blood and fire_

She was lucky that she had McGee looking after her when Michael came into his apartment and started to convince her that he was good for her. She was so afraid, she just hoped that McGee would return soon and save her.

_Bad decisions  
That's alright  
Welcome to my silly life_

Then she had a relationship with McGee, he was lovely, he cared a lot about her, but she didn't love him. She couldn't love him. Her heart always belonged to Gibbs, her silver-haired-fox. But it was better being with McGee than returning to an empty apartment every night.

_Mistreated  
Misplaced, missunderstood_

Everyone was afraid of her. Thinking goth people are all vampires, or freaks, or whatever. So she only could meet those "freaks", "normal" people would never go out with her. She had even tried internet-dating, but it also didn't work out. When they saw her they wanted to get rid of her as fast as they could.

_Miss 'no way it, it's all good'  
It didn't slow me down_

At least she was a brilliant genius when it came to her work. She had graduated university with being the best of all students. And because of her good qualification she had been accepted at NCIS.

_Mistaken  
Always second guessing_

All of Gibbs wives never believed she was brilliant. They always thought she was crazy and all that stuff. They couldn't understand why Abby was so special to him. They hoped she would be fired anytime soon.

_Underestimated  
Look I'm still around_

Especially Hollis Man had underestimated her. She hadn't treated her in the right way and Gibbs being protective as he was had set Hollis the boundaries. And she then disappeared like the other ones, which made Gibbs question himself what he did wrong. But she, Abby, she was always around, she never would leave him.

_Pretty pretty please  
Don't you ever ever feel  
Like you're less than fucking perfect_

He was fucking perfect for her, but Gibbs didn't see it, or didn't recognize it, she couldn't understand it. Maybe it was because of her hair color, maybe it was because of rule 12.

_If you ever ever feel  
Like you're nothing  
You're fucking perfect to me_

Gibbs always thought he wasn't capable to have a long relationship. His love of his life was Shannon and she was the only one with which he had an enduring relationship. But after her death, he didn't even want anything permanent in his life anymore. Maybe it was because he didn't want to protect them all the time, but her he always did.

_You're so mean  
When you talk  
About yourself  
You're wrong_

He always described himself as being a bastard, a broken man, divorced a lot of times, someone who didn't deserve to be loved. But he was so wrong. How often had Abby told him that he was her super hero, but he just understood it for the moment, after a while he had it forgotten again.

_Change the voices  
In your head  
Make them like you instead_

He had so many good sides on him, he never saw. He cared a lot about everyone he called family, he was always there if anyone needed him, he solved cased and fought for a better world. He protected her and saved her every time she was in trouble.

_So complicated  
Look happy, you'll make it_

He never looked happy, she always was the only one who made him smile. Why didn't he recognize it?

_Filled with so much hatred  
Such a tired game_

Ever since Shannon's death he had given himself the fault. He never had forgiven himself, nor would he allow himself to be ever happy again. But Abby couldn't understand why. She just couldn't.

_It's enough  
I've done all I can think of  
chased down all my demons  
I've seen you do the same_

She had given up, dating those freaks that weren't good enough for her. Instead she started bowling with the nuns. She wanted to forget about those awful things which happened in the past. He also had finally killed the murderer of his wife and daughter and because of her he wasn't even made responsible for it.

_Pretty pretty please  
Don't you ever ever feel  
Like you're less than fucking perfect_

God, she would do everything for him, but why couldn't he just see it! She was right there, right in front of him.

_Pretty pretty please  
If you ever ever feel  
Like you're nothing  
You're fucking perfect to me_

He was the thing which was missing to make her complete. The only one. She knew that she couldn't be the love of his life, but maybe she could make him happy enough to have a happy life again.

_The whole world's scared  
So I swallow the fear  
The only thing I should be drinking  
Is an ice cold beer _

_So cool in line_

_And we try try try  
But we try too hard  
And it's a waste of my time_

Maybe she should just tell him that she was in love with him, maybe she would open his eyes. But she was so afraid. She didn't want to ruin her special friendship with him. How often did she mean to tell him but then was too afraid to do it. Why couldn't he read her like he always did, he always knew what was wrong with her.

_Done looking for the critics  
Cause they're everywhere  
They don't like my jeans_

_They don't get my hair_

_Exchange ourselves  
And we do it all the time  
Why do we do that? Why do I do that?  
Why do I do that?_

She had started to dress herself a little more decent, a little less make-up, a little less goth, but still he didn't notice her. Maybe he wasn't in love with her, maybe he'd never be. Or maybe he was afraid to hurt her?

_Yeah? Oooh?_

_Oh pretty pretty pretty_

_Pretty pretty please  
Don't you ever ever feel  
Like you're less than fucking perfect_

_Pretty pretty please  
If you ever ever feel  
Like you're nothing  
You're fucking perfect to me_

Abby had fixed Gibbs eyes during the whole song, she wanted him to know now finally, she couldn't take it any longer. She wanted to know if he was in love with her too. She started signing at the last refrain *_Gibb's I'm in love with you, have been since day one, but I can't take it anymore, I'm leaving next month, start working with Tobias. I need to get over you_*

When Abby stopped singing everyone was cheering. It was a fucking good song, sung by a fucking good singer and also written by a fucking honest person. The whole team knew exactly that the song was about their boss. Abby once had told them that she was sooo damn deep in love with him that she couldn't date anyone else anymore. The team had told her to not get her hopes up, that was when she decided she needed to leave NCIS. She just couldn't stand to see Gibbs every day, once in a while with a new woman and he had to bring every single woman always down into her lab, as if he needed to ask for her permission or maybe to demonstrate her, that they'll never have a chance.

After the song Abby went immediately backstage, leaning her head against a wall. Tears had filled her eyes, but she couldn't cry now, not now, her make-up would be destroyed and she had to perform a few more songs. So finally he knew now, but he hadn't showed any reaction. Maybe indeed leaving NCIS would be best for her. Suddenly she felt a presence behind her, she it was him, she always knew when he was close.

"Abbs!" Gibbs spoke with a low voice and Abby turned around and that was when it happened. Gibbs took her face into his hands and kissed her. And she started kissing back, tears running falling down her cheeks, she was so happy, she couldn't stop them.

"Stay!" he pleaded her, still breathless from the kiss. "I also loved you since the very first day, but I never thought you would love me the same way. The reasons you already described fucking perfect in your song." He needed to smile which made Abby smile too. "I will" Abby answered and smiled.

Suddenly they were interrupted by a band member calling Abby to continue singing.

"Abbs! When you've finished, I'll take you home." Gibbs kissed her quickly again

"What about Diane?" Abby asked

"It's over, it was a few weeks ago, but she wanted to come to the ball…but we'll talk later. Go and sing, you do it fucking perfect!" Abby blushed but it didn't matter to her, she finally had succeeded and indeed they were fucking perfect for each other.

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Please let me know what you think! :-) Reviews motivate me to keep on writing.


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